Thursday, October 18, 2012


Do you ever have a particularly enlightening life changing experience, where your body feels free of the shackles of itself?  Then you pass by a mirror, and you remember, "Oh this is my body.  This is my face.  This is my reality."  What a strange moment. 
There are times that I feel so shackled by my physical body.  Not in the way of weight, or any other frivolous description, but in a way that seems to stunt my mental development.  I often wish that I could be invisible, and float through the world being unacknowledged as the person other people think I am/could be/should be.  To be invisible, and just experience nature.  To feel like an animal who is free of the thoughts that make humans so trivial. 
The older I get, the less amused I am with the daily goings-ons of the world around me.  Eating, drinking, bars, eating, drinking, blah, blah, blah.  It seems like such a boring way to live..  I find myself craving adventure!  Craving interpersonal ponderings and just "deeper" conversation in general.  I want to learn things, and I want to teach things!
I've never fully been able to identify with a lot of people around me (maybe noone does?).  This, I know, does not make me unique.  I am only one of millions that feel this way every day. 
Growing up, I found that most people seemed to lack compassion, and were completely unaware of the world around them, let alone other people.  That being said, I have met beautiful people in my life, people who inspire me to grow and advance in ways I couldn't imagine.  So my statement, even though a little harsh, I believe describes way too many people on this earth right now.  Unfortunately, it seems like more of these negatively charged people exist than the latter.  And those people seem to making the decisions that affect our earth, our media and our daily life. 
Why is this? 
I believe it's a lack of community, and a lack of love and respect.  Love in general.  Parental love, peer love, and love from our own psyche. 
With the breaking down of communities, we also saw the end of "holding ourselves to a certain standard" (on larger scales).  Being held accountable for our actions- small or large.  And we also lost the feeling of accomplishment that came from having a unique set of skills that helped the community/tribe/society flourish and sustain itself.  Pride.
No, there are no answers and none of this matters.  But I think it's nice to share these kinds random thought outpourings, because I know someone out there is feeling the same way :). 
Have a great day, and do something nice for someone <3.

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